My interview for a BDSMLibrary Forum

I am a member of a BDSMLibrary Forum, and recently volunteered for an interview with one of the members named AlexBragi. The interview is posted below.

Posted on November 2, 2006, at 9:58 PM
The world is competitive,
And, I'm ill-equipped to compete,
But I'm no less of a person,
Because I'm not complete.

I live in a body labelled "second" rate,
Thought I feel second to none,
When society knows the difference,
Then my battle's won. (Anon)

I must be honest here, when I began typing up questions to put to RickBulow74 I thought, "Sure, he said I could ask him anything, but can I really? And, if I do, will he get offended at all?" Well, yes I could, yes I did, and no he certainly wasn't. I had absolutely nothing to be concerned about. Rick has a physical disability, however he is exactly as he describes himself, "...an open book." And, as I found out—an incredibly interesting and remarkable "book" at that!

Alex: Rick, your "disability" is cerebral palsy, which quite obviously doesn't affect your brain, so what exactly is it?

Rick: Well, actually, cerebral palsy DOES affect the brain, though not in the way most think. Permit me to clarify. When I was born there was not enough oxygen to my brain, which left certain functions partially paralyzed. Some people look at those who have CP (short for cerebral palsy) and think they are mentally retarded. I am one of a few who are not mentally retarded. My paralysis comes from not being able to run or walk for a long distance or for a long period of time. Plus I have a hard time standing for too long of a time.

Alex: Ok, ok, I know this one a below the belt, but I have to ask it, do you have the same sexual functioning as a fully able bodied man?

Rick: It is, but I do not mind answering it, as most of the women have a right to know. Like I said above, my CP affects my running, walking, and balance. I am, indeed, fully functionable below.

Alex: Rick, you've been very frank and honest about your condition. You didn't have to be, so why did you choose to be so open?

Rick: The answer to that is real simple, Alex. I chose to come out with it because I am not afraid to come out and say that I have it. You see, I am of the philosophy that each of us were put here on this earth for one purpose or another, and I feel that whatever God has in store for me by letting me have a disability I say so be it. If you do not mind, there is a scripture verse in the Bible which I follow wholeheartedly. In 2 Corinthians chapter 12, the Apostle Paul was harassed by his own thorn in the flesh and he entreated God 3 times to remove it, but God declined, saying in verse 9 that "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore, as Paul continues, "I will glory in weaknesses, in infirmities, for when I am weak, He is strong." Whenever I see people in my Real Time (aka RT) travels and they ridicule me about my disability, I always tell then that "I have cerebral palsy, but it does not have me." as well as "I have cerebral Palsy, what's your problem?" The reason for the second one is because I might be disabled, but that is no reason or call to ridicule me for it.

Alex: That's a good attitude you have there, Rick. Now this interests me, as bdsm frequently involves levels of humiliation, particularly it's something submissives will often crave. So how will you deal with this if and when confronted with it?

Rick: I have no idea how I will deal with it right at this moment. I will deal with it when I cross that bridge.

Alex: You've quoted the Bible verbatim here. Are you a practicing Christian? We have quite a few here, you know. And, do you, or did you, ever have trouble reckoning your beliefs with your sexual desires?

Rick: I was up until a couple of years ago. Now I consider myself to be a spiritual Person. You see, I am originally from Chicago, and when I was there I was a Catholic. Then when I moved to Fort Myers, Florida, in 1987, I was a Baptist (I think the pastor of the first Baptist church I was a member of was concerned with how I was spending my sundays more than saving my soul), Non-Denominational, Swedenborgian (I am still debating what it is so do not even ask me), Jehovah's Withness, and finally Mormon. What turned me off to most of them is the strict rules iand cultures in some of them. I would rather read and follow the Bible on my own. Ya know, I used to have trouble with reckoning my spiritual beliefs with my sexual desires, but then I went to Yahoo Clubs and found a site in which the BDSM and the Christianity are intermingled.

Alex: You've had thirty operations on your legs and eye, that simply amazes me. Now, you did say I could ask you anything, so did you, or do you, ever find yourself fantasising about nurses and hospitals?

Rick: If you would have asked me this question when I was younger I would have said "Hell no!" But now that I think about it I would label that a distinct possibility. I am of the philosophy that I am willing to try anything, save for certain things, once and if I like it I will use it in my repertoire.

Alex: You've obviously give it some thought, so what "certain things" would be completely off limits to you?

Rick: Scat, animals, children, heavy pain, heavy bloodletting, and electricity are on my short list of DEFINATELY off limits things. Any else I am willing to try once, as I mentioned above.

Alex: You've described yourself as a 'switch'. You also say you are new to bdsm. Do you feel that there's possibility you might not have yet discovered what you are?

Rick: It might be possible that I might not have discovered what I am yet, but at the moment I do not, as I am very versatile and am willing to try anything. I felt that I had lived a sheltered life for too long and want to explore the lifestyle to the fullest.

Alex: Quite obviously, the metal side of bdsm won't be a problem for you, however it can also be quite physical. Have you considered how you will deal with that side of it?

Rick: I had considered it. In fact, a few days prior to volunteerring for the interview I had posted a thread entitled Handicapped People and BDSM in which I asked just how a person with a physical disability can be involved in the lifestyle.

Alex: You joined the Writers' Circle recently, how's it going down there?

Rick: Well, my RT has been very hectic, but know that I am currently working on something and will post it in the coming weeks.

Alex: You told Tojo, when you joined, " I do not consider myself a pervert YET. I consider myself a PREvert." How close do you feel you are now to being a full on pervert?

Rick: *chuckling as I recall those words* I think I am getting close to being a full on perv, but not there just yet.

Alex: I know that you'd like to work with computers sometime in the future. I also know that I speak for everyone here when I say I wish you all the best with that, and in finding someone special to share your bdsm life with. Thank you so much for sharing a part of yourself with us. You're an amazing man, Rick.

Rick: I thank you for the oppurtunity to be interviewed. If any want to know more about me, all they need to is hit me up on my messengers or in PM, as they are always open.

Click here to read Rick's short, short take.

Me with a couple of my animals

Here are some pics of me with a coouple of the animals that keep me company. Me with My mom's fiancee's dog, a cocker spaniel named Princesa.
Me with my own dog, a boxer named Chica (on the floor) and my mom's fiance's mom's dog, a schnauzer named Muffy (in lap)

Let us not forget this terrible day

(From my rant blog)

I know I will not. In fact, I remember exactly where I was on this day 5 years ago when I first heard about the plane striking the World Trade Center. I was at a McDonald's enjoying breakfast and listening to a local sportsradio broadcaster broadcast live from there when he broke for his 45 minutes past the hour break. I was about to walk over to him during the break and say that I wanted to speak about Michael Jordan's return to basketball and play for the Washington Wizards when I looked at his face which is that of shock. At first report it seemed to me like a small plane and that it was a freak accident, but when I heard of the second plane hit the World Trader Center I knew that this had to be some sort of planned attack. I spent the entire 9:00 hour glued to his little broadcast station as he had a set of headphones which I listened to the producer back at the station speak to him and updating him. There were other callers who chimed in with updates from the televised newscasts. After the show ended I hung around for a small time listening, then the host's dad offered to drive me to teh college where I could watch the TV in the library as well as get current updates on the internet. While en route I phoned my mom and stepdad to tell them what had happened. My stepdad told me that he had heard about it and that mom was going to get me and tell me but she saw that I was gone. When I went into the library at the college to watch the news, I almost fell to the floor upon seeing the planes striking the Towers and the Pentagon. About 11:45 I got word that the college was closing and called my grandma in Chicago to ask her if she and dad knew what was happening. She said that dad was on the way to the store but that they knew what was going on. After I spoke to grandma I went home and kept the news on the TV all the time, gasping and getting angry as to what happened.

I urge people to NEVER forget this day for as long as they live. I encourage everyone no matter where they are that if they have the American flag to unfurl it and wave it proudly, for as Frankin Delano Roosevelt said of another terrible day in American History, "This is a day which will go down in infamy."

One of my favorite pastimes

I love to chat online, and one place you can regularly find me is on AlterRealm in the Gorean section. I am a member of the Village of Kassau there, going by the name of Richard of Laura. Currently I am on a small hiatus from Gor to recharge my batteries and come up with a few roleplay scenarios which I hope to implement in the Village, as well as hopefully bring a friend I had met online in a nonGorean chatroom into Gor.

Richard is the third character I had while on Gor, and I had been chating on Gor first from 1998-2003, then I left because I thought I had failed. I got the books for Christmas last year, and since then I had a yearning to return to Gor. If you want to know more, I will post a link on here in the next few posts.

Tropical Storm Ernesto

Last Wednesday we had received a threat from Tropical Storm Ernesto. Mom had said that at first it looked like it was taking the same path as Hurricane Charley back in 2004, so I expected it to be a big rainmaker/windmaker, but it turned out to be a big old rainmaker instead. I am glad it just brought a lot of rain down, but was hoping for a LITTLE wind as well. Hopefully the season will be quiet fr4om now on and nonot be as hectic as it was the past 2 years.

I'm back

Sorry about not posting more about me, as I had been busy with offline items and also lost access for a while. By the way, I have an updated photo of mytself for all to view which I will put on my profile as soon as possible.